Knights are action oriented. They get an idea yet don’t think it through before rushing ahead. They are full of energy but brash, excited yet a bit too eager, full of ideas but impetuous. Sounds a bit like the past couple of months to me. As Covid 19 has emerged, our first response was... we’ve got this, nothing to worry about here, we know better (Knight of Swords). Then we realized we needed to Do Something so we did all kinds of anything, with gusto and enthusiasm, yet with little organization, planning or forethought (Knight of Wands). That’s us now. No clear, unifying plan of action but a lot of actions doing “something!”
When this shakeup, reset, reordering of our lives settles back down (and it will!), be prepared for it to look and feel very different from the way it was when we started this journey (10 of Pentacles). It’s going to look upside down, unfamiliar, and awkward. We’ll be wondering if we are really “there” yet. Our family dynamics will have changed. Our behavior will be different. We will have different priorities. It feels overwhelming now and it may feel like that when we begin to go about our business again, going out in public, hanging with friends, and hopefully giving hugs once again. It’s going to take something for each of us to stay grounded so that we can navigate this new terrain we’re headed for. So what do we do? Honor our already, in-place daily habits. Following our daily habits can be a great way to create a sense of safety and normalcy in a time when it doesn’t feel like there’s any at all. It’s a grounding tool that doesn’t take much effort and can almost be done on autopilot. Not only do daily habits provide safety, they have a rhythm to them that is soothing. What grounding habits am I talking about? Mostly the ones you already know and practice: Brush your teeth every morning Make your bed every morning Get dressed and out of your PJs Eat your meals at proper meal times Sit down to dinner with your family Go to bed at your regular bed time Simple, already in place. The only thing you’re doing here is naming what they are; acknowledging that they exist. You may have others to add. Add them. Committing to doing them daily is the goal here. Be intentional about it. It would be so easy to slack off, stay in your jammies all day watching movies or playing video games but the truth is that the closer you stay to your daily routine, the safer you will feel, the more in control. And naming your routine helps to acknowledge that you are on the right track and best of all you don’t have to learn something new. Just follow the plan you’ve been following for years. Write down your routine and keep it close where you can see it, maybe on the fridge or your mirror or at your bedside. It’s your plan for the day. Look at it every morning, just to be sure you know what you’re up to. It seems so easy and like something that isn’t important when in fact it provides an astonishing sense accomplishment when you do them every day. When you follow your habits daily are doing something extraordinary... you are keeping your word to yourself. You still might watch movies or play video games all day but when you follow your grounding habits, you’ll seriously feel like you had a winning day anyway. #winningcovid #groundinghabits #makeyourbed #getdressed #brushyourteeth #gotosleep
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Good Sunday to you. It’s early here. I woke up at 5:30 and that was that. Not sure what’s up. Maybe I’m finally acclimating to the time change. In any event, I awoke to a deep sense of being present. I’m contemplating gratitude and what I “get” to do instead of what I “have” to do or what I “should” do. I noticed that I have been very quietly (and maybe not so quietly) grousing about this and that. Nothing serious just... habitual, I think. Grrr, there are dishes to do. Argh, I have to fold clothes. Ugh, it keeps raining.
As I’ve tamped down my consumption of social media and online time, I notice I am more open to what is right and beautiful and a privilege. For me, I am so grateful my mom is home front he hospital (non-virus related issues) and doing well. That I am healthy and my family is healthy. That my kids have jobs and are working and figuring this thing out. I am grateful that I have a solid food habit in place. Three meals a day, no flour, no sugar. Goodness knows in the old days I would be on a tear with the junk. What a good excuse for drive through, right? But I have no interest. I’m so thankful. AND that good habit helps me stay sane. I’m not negotiating my food, which is a complete waste of energy. Instead I GET TO choose how to spend my days being of service to myself, my family, my community, my world. GETTING TO is the gift in a shift in perception. We all GET TO. So today, I get to feed myself good food, learn something new, spread good vibes, and sit in contemplation of all that I am grateful for.
We've seen anger and frustration at inequity and stereotyping explode into riots. We've seen children die in school shootings but no changes are made to gun policy. We've seen thousands of women come forward with courage and reveal the pain and devastation of their abuse and assaults yet abusers continue to go free. It's just awful. It really is. It's depressing and disheartening. And yet... And yet, there's still hope. I see good people every single day, out in the world, smiling and being kind. I see generosity and gratitude on a daily basis. I see love all around me; in my neighborhood, at the grocery store, in my home. I also see it online with congratulations and likes and funny videos and inspirational pictures. I love all of that stuff because it makes me feel good. And when I feel good, I'm nicer. And when I'm nicer, I spread that goodness everywhere without even trying. But what if we TRIED? What if we, intentionally and on purpose, spread the love? I believe deep down to the toes of my soul that THIS is the way to healing; to be the goodness the world needs. Even when it's hard. Even when you ache to insist that you're right. Even when a smile might hurt. Even when you've had a shitty day. What if, no matter what, you were the goodness the world needs. What if, no matter what, you were the goodness that the person in front of you or beside you or behind you needs AT THIS MOMENT? How amazing could our world be if each one of us in each moment was the goodness the world needs? I believe it could change the world... one goodness at a time.
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Lauren is...A Life + Career Performance Coach Archives
April 2020
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